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Below are 20 journal entries, after skipping by the 20 most recent ones recorded in misheymo's LiveJournal:

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Saturday, June 2nd, 2012
1:13 pm
for us serventless american cooks
i am currently watching julie/julia. i have the desire for some good french cooking but no desire to go out and buy ingredients or the patience to cook. or even know what i would want. something creamy and sweet i think.

i'm thinking about my speech and hearing. obviously the mris are clean or they would have said something. but the neuro didn't see me walking funny while my mcl in my left knee was strained! i'm having more and more speech problems. and depression. and together that was a crap thursday night. i stupidly decided i didn't need to take my meds. ok, big mistake.

any way, this whole speech thing. i'm working diligently at my sign language consulting aslpro as needed. mom and got our vocab down for next week and i'm ready to learn more!!! having 2 weeks off is boring. maybe if there had been more to practice or things to watch/look up, idk. i'm thinking more in the way of speaking in signs. maybe i'm starting to confuse spoken english and sign language? i don't know.
Monday, May 14th, 2012
2:33 am
mothers day, anniversary and the tale of an upcoming vasectomy
yesterday was our 7 years anniversary! and i spent most of the day sleeping due to my lyrica and not sleeping well during the night before. we went out to dinner at our local 24/7 diner and i had a nice fancy salmon special. enough celebrating. we are tightening our budget to work on getting our 2 loans paid off. at the beginning of the month i told him i want to get myself about $50 worth of stuff off amazon. if i get something with him knowing i won't be feeling bad about getting something behind his back and then buying more. i know its crazy ocd thinking but it is something that works for me. there are some good movies i want to own like the guard with don cheadle and a famous irish actor whose name escapes me.

jack went to his sisters for a mothers day celebration that i didn't go to cause i was so tired. mil loved the bracelet we gave her (bonus). our niece nona's b-day celebration is saturday so jack broke down and told them about his vasectomy on friday and that he/we may not be able to make it. turns out mil and oldest sil were very disappointed thinking there would be a chance for children. no such luck! i guess they just don't get that he doesn't want any.

mom and i start our ASL class tonight and it will be nice to have someone to study with.
Saturday, April 21st, 2012
7:31 am
meeting reading
so last night i was closest to the 'how it works' reading. yeah, i had to pick the longest thing to read right?! at least it was my home group.
Thursday, April 19th, 2012
12:20 pm
leaf dishcloth
just finished my leaf dishcloth. wish i could post pics.
12:06 pm
doc updates
with the symptoms i had i couldn't get tysabri. so on monday i have another mri. got xrays on my knee yesterday and nothing so i got sent to a pain clinic/rehabilition center. physical therapy on my knee and my back--surprised by my ability to bend forward like always. my thyroid is out of wack so i get to go to an endocrinologist. and next month jack is getting the big V!!!
Sunday, April 15th, 2012
2:54 am
ocd meds
i am almost out of my ocd meds. this is not good. i have the biggest urge to shop especially on etsy! there is so much stuff i want-not need. i know when i get my refill i'll be better but until then this is so hard. the shrink told my mom and jack i'd have to be on ocd med for the rest of my life and i think he was right.
Saturday, April 14th, 2012
3:06 am
total paralysis
i had total paralysis thursday night. no ability to sign speak or move. jack is getting better at helping me blow my nose thankfully. he still wipes snot over my face a little too much but, eh, what can you do.

its pretty painful to be paralyzed. and the next day is just as bad.

i'm hesitant to tell my neuro. the last time this happened he put me through the battery of tests for PML. i'm still negative for JCV the last time i got checked so i'm not too worried.
2:48 am
more problems with sugar
my morning hot chocolate is causing some serious sugar issues. so if i don't have a handful of soy nuts in the morning the sugar drops crazy. i'm worried that if i don't really buckle down on my eating healthy again i'm headed for full blown diabetes type 2. hopefully that won't happen.

making turkey hash for lunch/dinner out of my fix it and forget it likely cook book. its a good recipe. i've made it before.

unfortunately my pipes are backed up and have to be snaked. crap!
Friday, April 13th, 2012
12:27 pm
on a little manic spree today so i'm cleaning up my living room. finding all kinds of crap! and good stuff too. got some more boxes i gotta look through.
1:35 am
gas bill!
so excited! the lower temp made my gas bill 73.51!!! so happy : ]
Thursday, April 12th, 2012
1:22 pm
just 'jack'!
so the consult and the vasectomy fall on the same day. he is not crazy about this. but he knows its for the best.

so when i say 'vasectomy' he always gets this look on his face. i say 'every time i say vasectomy you look upset' he replies 'thats your perception'. i walk away. he says 'where are you going?' i say 'i feel like every time you say "thats your perception" you are trying to pick a fight.' so he concedes somewhat. yes, i interpret his facial expression as upset but he never tried to correct the assumption before. arrrrghhh!

i told him that a vasectomy will stop my insane fantasies about having a child and i'm hoping that is a good reason for him to go through with it now while it is covered by insurance. unfortunately with our fun life i'll still have to be on the pill for months : [
9:49 am
got some PIMPs to sell
got my 2nd order from yurtcraft in and now i want to get rid of my PIMPs pads. they are just to narrow and short for me. i'm surprised when people think they are too wide! srsly, i don't want to wear sexy undies during my period. i want comfy undies.

using my TP cloths is totally saving and is so much more comfy! i used to think it would be really gross but its not. no smell and i keep them covered till washing. total $$ saver.

glad the sun is out today cause my heat isn't turning on even though i turned it down again.

making plans to go up to scarbourough this summer and a possible stop off in essex ; ] going to visit newly found relatives on my mothers mothers side of the family. can't wait to see my cousins! mom is really excited too. and were going to take in the toronto culture. i haven't been able to do that in years! maybe i'll do some research and see about goth clubs up there...

start my ASL class monday may 14. it will be a good thing. hopefully my mom will get her cheque in soon so she can actually take it with me!

imuhna have ta re-learn my canadian accent, eh? nobody is gonna understand when i say 'dja-eet yet?'
Wednesday, April 11th, 2012
6:41 am
the month of april.
the 14th. anniversary of maryannes death. 6 years.
the 15th. no buying gas this day to send a message to the gas companies.
the 16th. anniversary of lisas death. 11 years.

the 22nd. earth day. must think of something amazing to do for earth day.
Monday, April 9th, 2012
2:02 pm
recycled/upcycled bracelet tower
i took 2 size 50 knitting needles and a piece of cardboard set for recycling and now i have a great bracelet tower! feeling creative.
1:11 pm
so ready to get off the pill. sure i like the consistent cycle and less cramps and that it is working on my PCOS. i just feel like i need a break. its been over 10 years since i started it. just waiting for jack to get fixed.

got some info on my medicare in the mail and now my mom has to check with the insurance company to find out the complications, conflicts--whatever.

jack and i were just laughing and i laughed so hard i cried. not tears through laughter, i was ugly faced bawling. i just wish i could just laugh like a normal person.

i'm getting better with my shopping habbits. sortof. you gotta do some shopping to save, right? its bad timing since our car insurance is due and the green fair is may 4,5,6. and i've definitely seen some things i like on facebook.

i trying to figure out what i can recycle/upcycle around my house to make a bracelet tower. i have so many and i need to use my jewelry box for earings/necklaces. maybe some super size knitting needles...

well thats my thoughts for tonight.
Friday, April 6th, 2012
9:04 am
pad review
so of all the cloth pads i've purchased i only have 3 so far.

c-pop commodities--timely shipping, great patterns but maybe too wide at the front and back.

yurtcraft--timely shipping, great patterns, totally comfortable

partypantspads--shipping eh, even in the same town! too short and twist around.

still waiting on amy's rag bag, eco alternatives and a wet bag from vulvalovelovely.

i'll post my review when i get them in.

got a nice bio-degradable stain wash so i sprayed it on my pads before i put them in the wet bag. have to do a load tonight so i can have comfy pads for tomorrow. i do love my cup but its nice to have a back up.
Friday, March 30th, 2012
6:58 am
new tattoos!
my icon is one of my new tattoos. if you look at my other icons you'll see the other one.
Tuesday, March 27th, 2012
5:17 am
asl class
well i think mom and i are going to take the spring summer asl class. i'd like jack to take it too but it would mean he'd have to get out of work early. but i really need him to learn more cause i'm really sick of doing the alphabet for every word! i definitely need to learn more asl to at least have a second language. one that i can use when i am having aphasia.
Monday, March 26th, 2012
3:11 am
new stash!
just got 2 of my 3 orders of cloth pads in and i love them! great patterns and sizes.
Thursday, March 22nd, 2012
2:03 am
cloth pads
i've decided to try several different types of cloth pads to see which ones i like best. currently i have partypantspads and have ordered from 2 other companies. i had a sample when i bought my diva cup but i didn't like it much so i gave it to my cousin.

i'm considering having my mom make me some. i know there are a lot of patterns on line but some close with safety pins--not a good idea. i don't need a piercing down there.
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